On the morning we left Meningie, we struggled to pack up our tent in the strong wind. However, we were lucky as it was a northerly wind and it helped us considerably on our road south to Kingston.

We ate up the kilometres as we cycled the undulating hills along the coastal road. On our way we met another solo cyclist who was cycling from Broken Hill to Melbourne. He was on a lightweight carbon road bike with the absolute minimum of gear and no panniers.  He looked professional and I felt just like an old guy on a big bike standing next to him. We caught up with him again at his lunch stop and chatted again. Yes I did just say ‘we caught up with him again’! To explain, just think about the tortoise and the hare story. 

This time as we chatted I felt a bit left out as he and Susan swapped advice on clothing and he shared that he was wearing a woman’s sleeveless woolen vest. Well, when I say he shared, he unzipped and showed us his camisole type top and spoke of the practicalities.  All I could see was his lean physique and hairy chest. Susan was most impressed and rolled up her shorts to show him her tan lines. I didn’t know where this was going but I remained confident and relaxed. I knew I could easily close down this conversation by offering to show my Rohan synthetic underpants that are entirely practical but fit like I’m wearing a bag of potatoes. 

After lunch we set off for an afternoon 80km but the wind died, the skies darkened and then came the mad magpies. We pass thousands of birds everyday – it’s part of the pleasure cycling in Australia. However, magpies are known to attack cyclists heads when they are nesting and we have seen cyclists with zip ties on their cycle helmets – they look like porcupines with the zip ties sticking up. We have never had a problem. 

This day as we cycled I was startled to see a magpie flying one foot off the road directly towards us. To describe, it was like the approach of Lancaster bomber in the dambuster raid culminating in a extraordinary swoop upwards as it reached the dam (bike) with claws extended and screeching. Now I don’t know if magpies actually have claws but the description fits. I was eye to eye with a mad magpie and if it was about intimidation and mind games it was winning – I was scared!

I looked up and there was another bandit circling at 12 o clock high ready to attack. There was not enough time to get out the zip ties and I had to think fast. We were under attack! So I deployed Big Gobby. ‘Oii Oii’ I shouted as loud as I could and let it have both barrels of sound. The bandit at 12 o clock twitched in mid flight and dived for cover in the trees. The first magpie came in for a second attack. ‘Oii Oii’ Big Gobby fired off again and the mad magpie turned away mid flight. Confidence returned to the terrified cyclists when they realised Big Gobby could stop birds in mid flight. The bandits headed for the distant trees.

As we continued cycling a couple of locals down the road were laughing -they had obviously heard Big Gobby. The British Expeditionary Force waved as they cycled passed. For the rest of the cycle Big Gobby was called into action several times. Unfortunately, there was also a couple of friendly fire incidents where I panicked and scared some perfectly reasonable parrot type birds but I was nervous and by this time had a hair trigger Big Gob. 

Eventually, after a long day and a reasonable 145km along the coast we reached Kingston. The following day we deserved a short 44km to the lovely fishing town of Robe where we are now. The small strip of land through the centre of this photo is the route we cycled. 

Adelaide to Robe: 384km

Total to date: 3,192km

Leaving Strathalbyn also meant leaving the Adelaide hills and our cycle got pleasantly easier. We continue to pass immaculately tended vineyards in the Fleurieu Peninsula and it really was just like cycling in France. Well, until you come to signs like this and it reminds you that you are in Australia. 

Now this is an opportune time to give a Kangaroo fact or two. Did you know that kangaroo hopping is the most energy efficient means of land travel in the animal kingdom! That funny bounce, bounce allows them to cover huge distances in habitats where there is little food or water available. They can outpace a racehorse, reach 40 miles and hour and in one leap can jump 3m high and 7.6m long. The secret is the elasticity of the tendons in their legs. Amazing large marsupial facts. 

I’m not sure how energy efficient our cycling is. It seems to take a lot of food and beer to get me to cycle any distance at all and you have no idea how many biscuits and cakes Susan needs to eat. We start the day with porridge and two hours later we need our second breakfast. Then there’s lunch followed later by afternoon snack. The last few hours of cycling consist of chocolate bars, bags of sweets and sugar drinks to get us to the finishing line. After stopping, within the next half hour, we ensure we each have a pint of strawberry milk for protein and carbohydrate loading for the following day. Quick shower then out for dinner and a beer. Again, I see the beer as essential carbohydrate loading. When we fall asleep at 9pm we are absolutely knackered from all the eating. Sorry, I mean absolutely knackered from all the cycling!

After 96km we reached Meningie and because our motel of choice was full with a touring party of charity cyclists, we decided to camp. Thankfully, our campsite was a bit of a change from our usual bush camps. 

Our short 47km cycle from McLaren Vale to Strathalbyn was through Australian wine country. The scenery was outstanding, the weather was great and it would have been an absolute pleasure apart from the hills and nearly 2,000 feet of climbing. We tackled our steepest hill of the trip with a 12% grade. What does 13% mean? It means really sore legs.

Along the way we came across something that was really quite concerning. Someone appears to have been doing some genetic experiments and created long necked sheep, probably to allow them to graze in bushes and trees. They appeared happy enough and I suppose the long neck maximises the amount of wool per sheep.  That’s progress I suppose. 

Leaving Adelaide (Thursday 6th October), we had a late start at 10am to miss the morning traffic on our cycle south.  Unfortunately the roads were still busy and after 45 minutes we stopped for a break outside ‘Subway’ to buy a sandwich for lunch later that day. Now I used to enjoy a ‘Subway’ but the pleasure was taken away when someone told me there was 1500 calories in my favourite sandwich. So Susan chooses now and I really don’t care what meat filling she says is hidden inside because its dwarfed by how much salad is added.

As Susan was buying the soggy rabbit sandwich I got a text from Adelaide Post Office to say a package had arrived.  Yes it was the new seat supports for ‘Old Lardy Ass’ from the Netherlands. I said to Susan that rather than cycle back into the city centre I would arrange for it to be forwarded to Melbourne. She looked me up and down, tried to give a kind smile to soften the blow and said ‘no I think you need all the support you can get, we should go back’.  

So we cycled all the way back into Adelaide, picked up the package and cycled out again. Once, twice, three times we cycled through the city but at least I now had my extra support. 

Now in South Australia nearly every cyclist cycles on the pavement. Calm down, calm down, it’s allowed by law. Yup they are quite enlightened here and maybe they should extend it to going through red lights and across pedestrian crossings? Actually, we don’t need that as we do that already! Haha only kidding. 

Unfortunately, due to the size of our bicycle and trailer we really have to stick to the road and, in South Australia, we should be given at least a metre space when passed by vehicles in town. This doesn’t really happen and, cycling out of Adelaide, we had quite a torrid time. It’s only a minority, but not a small minority, of motorists who won’t or don’t know how to share the road. 

Eventually we found the Southern Veloway and had a peaceful cycle towards McLaren Vale. Well, peaceful apart from Susan having a panting attack when we had to cycle up a long and very steep hill. At the top we rested in a bus stop and I just wish she allowed me to take her picture – it wasn’t pretty. Oh I know, where’s my sympathy? Nobody said going nowhere fast was easy! 

52km to McLaren Vale.