So we arrived in Bogotá and stayed in a small hotel near the airport. Our first issue was getting the third member of our party out of customs – yes I’m talking about the bike. To assist we engaged ‘Cargorider’ – a local agency that sorts through the myriad of local customs forms and procedures.

That said, it really wasn’t our first issue. Our first issue was Susan having altitude sickness. You see Bogotá is 8,612 feet above sea level and the air is noticeably thinner. I manned up but Susan felt sick with headaches and grumped at me a lot. To be honest I didn’t notice much of a difference 🙂 Happily it passed after a couple of days and she was back to her usual self.

Back to more important things – the bike! Everyone at Cargorider was very nice and helpful but that didn’t stop me from having to sit in the customs administration building with this view for 10 hours over 2 days.

Then it was over to the freight terminal where Susan relaxed as if she was sitting poolside whilst I did all the hard work.

Eventually the bike was out and back to the hotel where they had a nice caged entrance to keep it safe.

For the next couple of days we aclimitised and went on walking tours of the city. It’s such a lovely city and everyone was friendly. I even managed to get the local police to take Susan off my hands for a few hours whilst I went for a few quiet beers.

I was rather nervous taking this photo and talking to the ‘agentes de policia’ for I had in my possession a plastic bag of white powder! I know what you’re thinking – 4 days in and already Susan has driven me to some ‘cocaina’. Let me explain.

Susan uses milk subsititutes – you know the junk they mix with water and call it milk – oats, almonds, soya etc. In Colombia it’s hard to find that stuff in hotels and coffee shops so she has coffee ‘creamer’ in a plastic bag. I carry it in my man bag. I’m the ‘milk mule’.

However, we all know about police jumping to obvious conclusions based on flimsy evidence suported by a suspicious mind and a sixth sense for bad guys. Well I’m a white dude with a man bag on holiday in Colombia with a plastic bag of white powder. If it takes two days to get my bike out of customs I reckon I’m going to spend a month in jail whilst the milk powder is analysed! Keep your fingers crossed I don’t get searched!

Later that day, whilst on a walking tour, we experienced a 6.1 earthquake. The epicentre was about 100km away and all buildings were evacuated.

I recognised the same side to side wobbly feeling we had experienced in New Zealand a few years ago. You know the feeling – when you’re over a certain age, you’re in the pub drinking, you’ve been sitting too long and you decide to use the facilities. Legs are a bit shaky, you use the table for balance and within a few steps it’s all over. That’s just like a small earthquake. Susan said it was the first time the earth has moved for her in years!

On our final day in Bogotá we went on a food tour and sampled many local delights. Usual South American food stuff like strange fruit, empenadas, tamales etc. However, we also had the opportunity to try some Capivara, a delicacy in northern Colombia. What’s a Capivara you may ask? Well let me help your enquiring mind with a photo of a taxidermy model provided by the restaurant.

Yup that fella is a Capivara, the largest member of the rodent family. Essentially, the restaurant was offering us a bit of barbequed rat meat.

Most of the tour group wimped out and gave it a miss but Susan reckoned it couldn’t be any worse than my cooking so we both jumped right in. What did it taste like? A bit like pork with a slight fishy aftertaste. It was more of an eating experience than a pleasant mouthful.

Susan takes the lead in most of interactions with the locals as the vast majority of Colombians don’t speak any English. It’s a great benefit that Susan has been learning Spanish for the past year and she makes a good effort. Myself, I’m kind of a language nomad – whatever country I’m in I throw in a random phrases like merci or danke schon. I’m just one big language melting pot. I get caught up in the enthusiasm of everyone speaking a foreign language and don’t want to miss out. Comprende?

My biggest issue here is replacing gracias (Spanish) with grazie (Italian). I think I get away with it and they think I’m Italian. Unfortunately, Susan is now inadvertently copying me. I’m sure when we leave this hotel the staff will say ‘they were a nice Italian couple’ 🙂

So that’s a short summary of our time in lovely shoogly Bogotá. It’s not like the narcos movies and a lot has changed in the last 20 years. It may never be a city you feel a need to visit but Susan and I thoroughly enjoyed our time. Bogotá is ‘molto bene’!

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