Jersey Lily eventually made it to Langtry, Texas, the town named in her honour, and found that her admirer Judge Roy had recently died. During her short stay she was asked to cut a pack of cards. Fittingly she drew the Jack of Hearts.

Lily was a princess, she was fair-skinned and precious as a child,

She did whatever she had to do, she had that certain flash every time she smiled,

She’d come from a broken home, had lots of strange affairs,

With men in every walk of life which took her everywhere,

But she’d never met anyone quite like the Jack of Hearts. (B.D)

It’s been a while since I last wrote the blog or so it seems in the life of a touring cyclist – so many places and people all blur together. You’re probably thinking it’s not been that blinking long!

We’ve been busy relentlessly turning the pedals and dealing with the rain, wind and hills. Now I’ve got the time to catchup.

So last time I wrote we were at the nice Comstock Motel.

What a great place. Notice the nice touch with the life size silhouette of the horse and the cowboy – you just don’t get such authenticity at a Hilton!

Essentially, Comstock is not much more than a ghost town with nothing left at the centre apart from a small gas station, Border Patrol Station and The J and P Bar and Grill across the road.

The place next door to the J and P has long since closed and I was disappointed I was not eating catfish that night – a local southern States favourite. Instead, it was a rather nice burger and chips at the J and P and a great chat with the locals in the saloon with the chipboard walls. Obviously, one of those authentic retro designed places – you don’t get that either at the Hilton!

Next morning it was raining but as we only had 30 miles to cycle to Langtry, we waited until 11am when the rain stopped. We then started cycling and the rain started too.

So we arrived at Langtry soaked to the skin and sat in a warm and very welcoming Texas Visitor Centre where the staff couldn’t be nicer. The visitor centre was built around the original bar of Judge Roy Bean.

Now I could tell you the colourful story of Judge Roy Bean but to save me typing here’s a photo of the historical information marker.

Now here’s the best photo I could get of old Judge Roy Bean. Apologies for the quality – it’s a photo in a glass cabinet and I’m cold and wet through.

Hopefully, you read the plaque and it’s interesting to see that the town of Langtry was named after the actress Lillie Langtry.

Lillie, born in Jersey and known as Jersey Lily, was a famous actress and socialite in her day. Living in New York and London she had relationships with quite a few famous aristocrats including Prince of Wales (later Edward VII) and was introduced to Queen Victoria. It must have been quite a journey for her to travel to this remote place in Texas with its adobe brick (mud) and wooden buildings.

The visitor centre has correspondence from Judge Roy to Lillie and its quite poignant that by the time she actually visited the town he had died.

So guys the message is this. If you see a famous woman on the television or in the movies and take a liking to her then start corresponding. Rename your house in her honour (hopefully your wife wont mind) and persist.

If Judge Roy can get Lillie Langtry to visit a remote wilderness in Texas you also have a chance. Don’t get put off by the police and the restraining order and please don’t say I encouraged you. All I’m doing is giving you the facts – you may be old, have a beard, have next to no money and a house made of wood but you’re still in the game!

Ladies I’m afraid it doesn’t work the other way around – us guys are far too discerning 🙂 (yes I know that’s a damn big lie!)

Incidentally, ‘The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean’ was made into a movie directed by no less than John Huston and starring the incredible Paul Newman.

That night was camping night and we left the warmth of the Visitor Center for the relatively dry bit of ground behind the community center. Well it wasn’t actually dry but it was the bit of ground that wasn’t flooded.

Yes I know – you’re jealous your holidays are not like this!

It gets better though. We may have had no sleeping mats but we used the bike seat covers to lie on. We may have had no sleeping bags but we had a woollen blanket the kind owner of the Comstock Motel gave us. We may have had no stove but we had cheese crackers and spam for dinner ! Yes you heard me right! Tasty spam that all you posh people no longer eat. Get soaked through and lie in a tent in a wet field and then you’ll know how tasty spam is!

It gets better. The tent is pretty small but we shared it. Yes, Susan and I shared the tent with another couple – Mr Bourbon and Mrs Netflix! Ha ha now you really wish you could have been there!

So that was us – sleeping in damp clothes under a blanket. It wasn’t all fun though particularly for poor Susan. In the small tent we had to sleep head to foot and Susan’s head shared the same space as my feet in two pairs of damp socks. That’s what I call love.

On the road in far west Texas we are missing our sub standard motel breakfasts (I promise not to criticise them again). Gas stations are in short supply. Grocery stores are few and far between. The rain and wind are trouble and the hills keep on rolling.

It’s times like these you need something dependable 🤠

‘When you’re weary, feeling low,

When tears are in your eyes

I will comfort you’

Yes, yes, I’m going to complain about the weather again – ‘oh no stop banging on about the sun and the unbearable heat’ I hear you say. Well stop rolling your eyes just for a second and listen to this – we’re cold!

We all know that America is a country of weather extremes. Hurricane Michael has just devastated the Florida Panhandle only a few weeks after we cycled through. In the last week or so, we cycled through Texas hill country and today the area is suffering from serious flooding after nearly 10 inches of rain fell in the last few days. Roads we cycled along are flooded and closed.

When we reached Del Rio we had a planned rest day that turned out to be two rest days. Why? A cold front has swept down America and the temperatures are now 20-30F lower than usual at this time of the year. In some nearby areas they are experiencing record low temperatures for this time of the year.

On the day we were due to cycle north towards Comstock there was a 30mph headwind, rain and flash flood warnings for west Texas. If there’s one warning you listen to in Texas it’s a Texas flood warning! We also recognise that we are pretty vulnerable on a bicycle on roads that are very susceptible to flooding.

So instead of cycling on Monday we went to the movies. $3 each – I wish it was as cheap in the UK.

We started cycling today (Tuesday) and, as the rain moved eastwards to blast the rest of Texas, we only had some short spells of drizzle. Unfortunately, we still had to contend with a 20mph headwind and a ‘feels like’ temperature of 37f (3c). Yes, that’s right – in the space of a couple of weeks we go from 115f to 37f. How do you cope with that!

Well we coped by going to Walmart to buy some additional clothes. Most important for me is I now have a nice pair of fleece gloves for my cold hands. I’m also wearing two pairs of socks and using my old trick from Canada – putting my feet into plastic carrier bags before I put my shoes on.

So that’s us now cycling west for the next few days over reasonable hills against an unreasonable headwind. It’s going to be slow and pretty cold.

Added to this, we will have to camp tomorrow as there are no motels on the next stretch of road. We’re travelling as light as we can so although we have a tent we don’t carry any other camping equipment – no sleeping bag, mat, cooking facilities etc etc. Just a tent. We just didn’t expect it to be near freezing!

So that’s it. No more complaining about the heat and I bet you’re glad about that. I’m now complaining that we’re cold and until it gets warmer I’m going to have a good moan about it!

Can’t leave you without at least one picture so here’s where we are now – that’s us in Comstock, the big cold blue dot.

The serious flooding is between us and Austin to the east – that’s Texas Hill Country.

We will continue heading west towards El Paso. What will weather be like when we get there? Well, it could be freezing cold or a heat wave. That’s America!

From Johnson City we headed along the Texas Hill Country Trail through Fredericksburg and onto Highway 16 to Kerrville. Taking the highway with its nice wide hard shoulder saved us 10 miles and 800 feet of climbing. A no brainer really.

Throughout this cycle we follow the recommended Adventure Cycling Association (ACA) route when it suits. However, the ACA route favours backroads leading to campsites and avoids the major cities. We visit cities and favour motels so often take our own path.

This tends to place us, at times, on highways with traffic but, to be honest, cycling on a highway with a wide hard shoulder can actually feel safer than a single carriageway backroad where we are exposed to fast overtaking traffic, relying on vigilant drivers. Most Texan drivers have actually been good but every day we still experience the occasional ‘deadneck’ who comes within a foot or so of us.

Another experience we are still familiar with is punctures! We crossed Canada and Australia with one bike wheel puncture. On the road to Fredericksburg we suffered puncture number seven.

As I’ve explained before Susan doesn’t mend the punctures – she’s just the only available model I have to make a puncture repair photo more interesting. She’s cheap to employ, she smiles for the photo and only occasionally throws a ‘supermodel’ tantrum. No sorry, that’s actually me who has the tantrums and to be really honest, they’re more like ‘two year old tantrums’ – a puncture causes me to scream and stamp my feet! That’s actually the real reason I’m not in any puncture repair photos!

Along the way we passed many large Texan ranches. Cattle used to be huge in Texas when longhorn cattle were kept on wide open ranges and looked after by cowboys called vaqueros. At its peak, in the 1880’s, there were about five million longhorn cattle in Texas but numbers have declined for many reasons including low beef prices, drought and the end of the open plains.

From the late 19th century cattle have been kept in enclosed ranches and farmed in much smaller quantities. Do you know whose invention caused this? Well that will be Mr J. F. Gladden who, in 1874, invented, of all things, barbed wire.

This invention meant large areas could now be fenced cheaply and cattle were now enclosed and no longer roamed the plains. I’m now almost crying whilst I write this because do you know what it led to – the decline of the cowboy! The long drive was now a thing of the past – the age of the wild and free cowboy was gone all because of barbed wire!

Many Texan ranches no longer have cattle and the famous and historical YO Ranch last held cattle in 1941. Instead these ranches now have goats (for mohair) and are also hunting reserves for what they call ‘exotic’ animals. You see you are not allowed to hunt Native American deer which ‘belong’ to the state so ranches get around this regulation by keeping exotic deer and other animals.

Effectively, this means Susan and I cycle along and see a wide range of beautiful and colourful deer (that you would normally see in Africa and India) grazing beside a sign which says ‘come and hunt exotics’. I’m not saying anything more or I may start crying again. Oh, I wish barbed wire had never been invented, cows roamed free, nobody shot lovely cute deer and I could be a cowboy! 🤠

Talking about ‘exotics’, Susan and I met another exotic creature – a recumbent cyclist doing the cross America route!

Craig is heading west to east and is loving the hills as much as we do. His rear storage is a self made cool box and he has adopted a novel solution to the stand going through sand by fixing a golf ball on the end. Nice!

From Kerrville, we again left the ACA Route as the only motel at Leakey was fully booked. Instead we headed 76 miles (2900 foot ascent) along the lovely Highway 41. Well, lovely apart from the hills. You see this is the kind of route ACA misses as it hunts for campsites.

Unfortunately, there was only one place en route to grab some refreshments but what a place it was – the Garven Store, a local legend.

Doesn’t look like much but guess what? Yes, it did have the ‘best dang jerky in Texas’! We also had a sausage wrap which was a big 8 inch smoked sausage with a 3 inch tortilla wrapped around it! Susan ate some but didn’t like it because she has a really big problem with food like this – she actually looks at what she’s eating!

In my world, rule number one is cover the food product in the sachet of mustard provided, look at the surrounding view and stick the sausage in your mouth! The result was a damn fine tasty sausage wrap! Oh, and an added tip is always sit with your legs apart to allow the juices and fat flowing off your chin to miss your cycle shorts!

After lunch, the road flattened out as we approached Rocksprings and the early evening sun cast light over the Texan countryside.

As you will see from the photos, over the past few days there has been clouds and the temperature has peaked around 86f (30c) which meant for relatively pleasant cycling compared to the searing hot days.

At Rocksprings we stayed at the quaint Rocksprings Historic Hotel. Dinner was draft Bud Light and burgers at the illustrious Jailhouse Bar and Grill. It was a bit more jailhouse than illustrious but it was fine. The beer was cold and you never knock a place with cold beer.

The following day we set off for the 74 miles to Del Rio. Unfortunately it was one of those days when I felt I had man flu. I didn’t actually have man flu I just felt like I did! You see I need to eat a lot to keep going – yeah I know you’re surprised and seeing my pictures that maybe it has come as a bit of a shock to some.

When I don’t eat enough the ‘man flu’ symptoms appear – legs and arms like jelly. The remedy was to eat nearly everything we carried which wasn’t a lot – jerky, pecan nuts, banana and energy jellies. They helped a lot but I was so tired I nearly asked Susan to pre-chew my beef jerky for me but I think that would have tested our relationship.

So on this day the Texas hills were certainly no place for this old man but Susan pedalled well and got me through my very low spot. Which was just as well for in the last 15 miles to Del Rio the sun came out with a vengeance. It was Susan’s turn to falter and she felt dizzy under the heat. It didn’t help that we had run out of water as there was no opportunity to replenish over the 74 miles. But hey everything was okay because the big fat guy on the front was back in fine form and saved the day! That’s what I call teamwork.

Del Rio – 1560 miles down.

Ps before I leave you I’ve got to issue a retraction. Following the last post (Texas Hill Country Part 1) Susan’s lawyers have been in touch. I would like to clarify that at no time on this cycle tour has Susan worn nail polish or carried any bottles of said nail polish. I also promise to maintain the integrity of this blog and everything else I say from this time will be the truth.

Leaving Austin we were aware we were heading over the west Texas hills before we left our motel. Nearly everyone we met told us with a smile. We even received an occasional chuckle – poor bloody cyclists they should get a truck!

Now through meticulous planning we actually know the total ascent and descent each day. We have GPS, topographic maps and detailed route plans for every day so we know about the hills of west Texas but that doesn’t make them any easier.

Our recumbent tandem is a marvellous way to pedal together on long tours. Being together allows Susan to give me advice from the rear seat. How useful is that!

Regularly people remark that it looks laid back easy and they must get one. Some obviously think I’m lying back on my ‘lazy boy’ chair and only missing a cold beer and a television strapped to my handlebars! Others don’t even notice Susan’s pedals and think she’s just sunning herself! Then we have the regular comment from guys as we pass ‘she’s not pedalling mate‘. ‘Oh I know, doin’ her nails‘ I shout back. Honestly, that bit of male banter, time and time again, is worth a ten minute Susan huff 😀

In reality, the tandem takes a lot of pedalling when it’s heavily laden with our gear and all the bottles of Susan’s different coloured nail polish! 😀 Add a slope or any sort of hill and the speed drops dramatically and the effort increases reciprocally. It’s not the best bike on the hills and we should know by now – we’ve certainly been over a few!

We don’t have the trailer this year though we are loaded with two additional side pod bags to carry those unavoidable items of gear that were formally in the trailer. We have a lightweight tent but absolutely no other camping gear and the reduction of the trailer weight and drag has been a significant change for the better. Climbing hills is still slow but the effort is greatly reduced.

Here’s a reminder picture of our bike set up as we cross the Texan hills. Please don’t mistake Susan’s smiling face as meaning the hills are easy – she’s eating a cake and she always smiles when she has cake!

Back to the journey. We left Austin on quiet routes without traffic. Sweet.

Then this happened.

We actually went through this junction as I thought we could be quick enough to cycle to the slightly clearer skies beyond. Ever the optimist! Within a mile we had turned around to head for a local fire station we had passed – it was the only shelter for miles and miles around!

So for the next 90 minutes we rested whilst the thunder was frightening, the lightning shot across the skies and the rain came down like the plug had been pulled. Texas thunderstorms – everything’s bigger in Texas!

At least we were dry – result! Well, we were until we reached a ford.

Now I would like to have given you a picture of myself pushing the bike through the water but the tandem is a mighty beast and the last time I pushed it through a bit of a stream in Australia the current caught the back wheel and everything moved sideways. So I needed Susan to help and so you are, unfortunately, not getting a picture of me sliding into the water! I know that’s just what you want but, come on, let’s be a bit responsible here!

So only our feet got wet. No big deal really apart from the fact that it actually takes two days for the shoes and socks to dry out. Susan overreacts and when we arrive at our motel she puts my shoes in a drawer because of the damp shoe smell. You see what I’ve got to put up with?

After 47 miles and 2800 feet ascent we arrived in Johnson City. Now before I leave this short story of our cycle I’ve got to show you a picture of Johnson City jailhouse. This is the kind of jailhouse you would see in a western movie. It’s where bad guys should reside in the Wild West.

Now I know you’re now saying – where’s the interesting historical facts? Tell me some history, tell me a story. Okay then, here it is – a picture is worth 94 words!

Oh and you read it right – they still keep the bad guys here! So when you’re in Texas be good!

Bye y’all.

Cycling through the oh so rolling hills of west Texas can only mean one thing for two old pensioners – it’s jello time!

A cup of hot jello at bedtime does wonders for the knees. Sugar free of course – we don’t want any more wheel spokes to go bang!

From Bastrop we had a short 33 miles into Austin.

Along the way we met Susan and Spencer who are cycling across America from west to east. Yes, that’s not a typo – I’m giving you a picture of two Susans for the price of one. I appreciate you may prefer a picture of two Cliffs but that would just spoil you.

After the meeting of the Susans we reached Austin in good time along relatively good cycling roads.

The following day we enjoyed the sights of Austin. What a great city it is.

We started the morning at Torchy’s with a breakfast taco. That’s what you do in Texas – you eat Mexican food. That’s unless you have a motel breakfast as we do each day. Every motel is the same.

We start with some nice orange water. Then its ‘All Bran’ – it’s kind of like cardboard flakes and served in a cardboard bowl. Once I even ate the bowl and didn’t notice! Honest 😀. Then Susan has toast with cream cheese and jam whilst I have some yellow stuff (may be egg) on top of a light brown disc (may be sausage patty) between two bits of cardboard (shaped like bread, cold and wet until toasted). Now I see why Americans add ketchup to everything – its the only thing that gives breakfast some taste. And what’s this with the patty sausage America? A sausage is sausage shaped! Come on get a grip of your sausages!

Before leaving the breakfast room we wrap up a few stale cakes for the journey and I sneak out four bananas, two of which go in the waistband of my shorts. If you lifted my t shirt it looks like I’m playing cowboys with two bananas as my guns!

So Torchy”s Tacos was a nice change and my breakfast taco was scrambled eggs and potatoes topped with beef brisket, cheese and spicy sauce on a tortilla. Outstanding!

Then we went down South Congress Avenue where all the tourists go. It’s vibrant, hip and cool. I fitted right in of course!

We also visited Allen’s Boots and this is just one of many aisles.

Now I know we all have some cowboy in us so what about this for a sight! Boot heaven.

Above, you will also see a picture of the Texas State Capitol building. The Goddess of Liberty was hoisted to the top of the dome in 1888, making the building 14 feet taller than the U.S. Capitol in Washington. You see, everything’s bigger in Texas!

Before I move on from the State capitol building you can also see above a picture of Davy Crockett – he’s the guy in the yellow suit. Well we all know he died at the Alamo fighting the Mexicans and if you don’t know then please read the rest of this blog for the historical information you’re missing in your life.

Did you know that Davy, commonly known as the ‘King of the Wild Frontier’, was actually a politician and elected to the House of Representatives for four years?

He was his own man and had a problem with the president of the day, Andrew Jackson, and his policies including the ‘Indian Removal Act”. This led to Davy, a man of principle, losing the election for a third term and eventually ending up at the Alamo where he died, aged 49. Popular stories after this death focused on his life of adventure and created the larger than life character we know today.

We also visited our eleventh bicycle shop in America. None other than ‘Mellow Johnny’s’ owned by the legendary Lance Armstrong, seven times winner of the Tour de France. Yes, I know there’s been some alleged issues and he may not be a role model but he rides a bike. Nuff said.

Lance has a cool bicycle shop. We were looking for a Texas thorn proof inner tube but, as we have found out, 26” x 2 size isn’t popular in America. So we left without an inner tube and we didn’t meet Lance but I did get new shorter bolts for my shoe cleats. That’s stopped my feet feeling like they’re on fire. Thanks Lance 👍

In Austin we eventually found some fantastic donuts. We’ve been eating Walmart donuts and they’re okay but Voodoo Donuts, Austin are spectacular. This is our donut box and a bottle of bourbon some guy recommended.

The following day Susan and I were to start cycling through Texas hill country and we had donuts and bourbon for dinner. That’s all – just donuts and bourbon.

Not the food of champions before a big day of cycling but if you would rather have pasta you’re taking life too seriously. If you would rather have donuts and bourbon then you’re welcome to join our next cycle!

So that’s Austin – please visit sometime if you’re cool and trendy like me. Its a great city.

I will leave you with the words of Davy Crockett after he lost the election for his third term in U.S. Congress

‘You may all go to hell and I will go to Texas”

Really, I can’t think of a better place to go.